No Lawyer Left Standing Initiative

Impatience with the slowness of efforts to close the courts to litigants is what drove the Administration to literally fire the first shot in its groundbreaking "No Lawyer Left Standing" initiative.

Everyone remembers that Vice-President Dick "Lying Sack of Excrement" Cheney, hunting on a private lawyer ranch near Kingsville, Texas, bagged an impressive buck (Harry Whittington, UT Law '50).

What few knew until now, however, is that this effort was part of a larger Administration plan.

Under the new program, hunters may take one white shoe in-house lawyer or three outside lawyers daily. The limit has been suspended for trial lawyers.

"We've just got to thin the herd," said the Vice-President. "We've tried tort reform and caps on damages, but people are still suing." Cheney added, "It's easy and fun. In Texas, you can shoot in almost any direction and hit a lawyer."

This was also Cheney's first combat duty.